Leave google at the door

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Tshwane wants to be the next idol

This is the City of Tshwane's logo. WTF? It looks like a city logo in goth drag.

But it got me thinking, why do we not discourage people from idiocracy? Its kinda like the fools who want to be the "next idol" but couldn't hit a note, even if they fell on a piano. Surely at some stage, they sang for someone and asked for feedback. If we were just honest with these people in the first place, then so much pain and suffering would be avoided. The same for the Tshwane logo. Why didnt somebody speak up?

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Monday, February 19, 2007

Cape Town Traffic Circles

I was in Cape Town recently, and besides the coked up vintage hippies with their pretentious glasses and oversized curtain-like dresses... people in Cape Town CANNOT drive. There seems to be no understanding that in the art of driving, especially when there is an oversupply of cars, it does not make sense to cut into lanes when its not your turn... you just hold up traffic. The sum of the whole is greater than its individual parts?

Besides this madness, they have these massive four lane traffic circles. Yes, I know, four lane traffic circles? Obviously this was the breeding ground for the genia (pronounced jeen-ee-i) that mapped out Pretoria. What I can only guess is an attempt to correct moronic Cape Townian driving, they have put in traffic lights IN the traffic circle. Huh? Isn't it reduntant to have both?

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Freekin Pretoria

I had to go to Pretoria today- Pretoria should actually be a question by itself, and the question would quite simply be: Why? But, I digress...

I went to Pretoria today. I HATE Pretoria. It defies the laws of logic, common sense and evolution. Firstly, you dont leave the same way you enter the city. The N14 literally ends. And then *surprise* you are in Pretoria central. So you can forget the idea of "backtracking".

Then, the city centre has 3-lane one ways. Come on! Could you seriously not have made ONE freeking lane go in the opposite direction? If you make a wrong turn, a simple u-turn evolves into a L-shape recovery as you try to negotiate the one ways back to where you started.

Then to leave the city centre, you have to "find" the N14 again. I say "find" because well, the bloody thing disappeared 8km's to the left of where you are now heading. The whole place is basically what happens when a city planner develops a sense of humour- at your expense.

I am told however, that much of my Pretoria angst would be solved if I just enter at the "UNISA side" of Pretoria. But, does anyone actually know how to get there?

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Thursday, November 23, 2006


Back from blogging obscurity :)

But more importantly, how does Aquafresh toothpaste always come out the tube stripy? No matter how you squeeze it, at an angle, from the side, it always comes out in the perfect aquafresh stripe.

Personally I think it may be witchcraft, but I am open to suggestions.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

The question which flumexed me

This is a serious question: What is the difference between a warranty and a guarentee?

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

The Easter Bunny

Ok so I have been bad with posting. Sue me.

It's recently been easter etc. Here's what has been bothering me: Where the hell did the easter bunny come from? Easter, passover whatever you want to call it has no symbology (Boondock Saints:1998) of bunnies at all. What disturbs me even more is that these 'Easter' bunnies lay eggs.

I would love to meet the marketing genius who thought that up. He was probably saying to himself, "We need to find a way to commercialise the crucifixion and resurrection of Christ. What shall we do... what shall we do... Oh, I know, we'll market a bunny that lays chocolate eggs. "

Seriously, they picked an animal that fornicates (ref: shagging like rabbits) at an incredible rate and gives birth to live young? Am I the only one missing the conceptual link here?

Friday, March 31, 2006

the brits

I dont understand the British. They came, saw, conquered etc and left us with the metric system. So most, if not all the colonies are using the metric system. SO could somebody please explain to me the hell the British work in stones and or pounds . And how much is a stone anyway? The Brits also use miles instead of kilometers.

Do they know something we dont? Maybe the metric system is crap, a hoax, a farce. Or only good for the help :P